Begin Again…Bye Felicia…Changes sucks.

 

I hope everyone has had a great week! Man that full moon last week…I love full moons but man my week was a little crazy (my students especially but we all survived!)

Has anyone ever seen the movie Begin Again? It has Keira Knightley, Adam Levine, and Mark Ruffalo and it has a really good story line! It’s directed by John Carney and I have discovered that I really like his productions (The movie Sing Street is amazing too). The album has some catchy songs, even cliche…so you should totally check it out!

So.

I was trying to come up with ideas for my next blog and I decided that this one was going to be about change.

Change.

Everyone knows about change. Some people like it. Some people don’t. There is good change that we like because we choose to do it and/or accept it. Then there is change that may be considered “bad”, “negative”, or not what we want at all.

Good change: getting a new haircut. Don’t you just love the freshness you feel when you chop off your hair and style it different because you’re getting tired of the same ole look? (Actually I need one pronto because my hair is getting too long and within the past few years, I’ve discovered I love having short hair). ANYWAYS…

Good change: getting a new job. Not because you hate your current one but you feel the need to set new goals for yourself or you want to do something else. Recently, I moved to a new town, got a new job. I’m a recent college graduate (6 years of college is looooong) and I wanted to live somewhere different. Now I won’t lie, the transition has been a bit rough because I love being close to home and I really prefer being around the country yet close to small towns/cities. I also love being around my friends and family and I miss them. I am in a place where I barely know anyone (slowly I getting to know some people). So you see, the transition of becoming an official adult, graduating from college, moving to a new place, a new job…yeah, it is a bit overwhelming.

Change that is “bad”, “negative”, or not what we expect: new rules/standards/regulations being implemented at work and it disrupts the routine you have already established.

Change that is “bad”, “negative”, or not what we expect: Friends/family/romantic partner becoming distant or not being the same person you have seen them. Chances are, they are going through changes, just like you.

Change is uncertain. It’s inevitable. In the long run, change is good for us. It helps us grow. It helps us become people.

the-secret-to-change-socrates-meme

It will make feel sad, upset, angry even. And that’s okay. As human beings, it is okay to feel all of these emotions. I’m not gonna lie, I used to be one of those with not being okay with feeling sad or mad.

change-is-scary-meme

It’s hard when things seem to be in a “normal” routine and then something changes (good or not) and the outcome turns out to be different than what you expected. Then that ensues to become the new normal. I know I personally struggle with change. Especially when it involves people leaving my life. Or even if it’s me doing the leaving.

Of course some people leave because they get a new job, move to another place, get married, beginning their family, etc. and you continue to keep in touch with them.

And then there are some people who become less and less present in your life due to whatever reason and one day, you find out they are not longer there anymore.

It sucks when people you love leave you or you are the one doing the leaving.

You know that phrase “sometimes people are in our lives for a season”? Yeah it is too true. Now there are some people you gotta be like DEUCES!

bye-felicia

But then there are some others who you may not have to necessary say good-bye but a “see you later”.

After my mom died, my dad became less present in my life and then one day, he just up and left. He told me “see you later” but I felt it much more as a “good-bye.” Yes I was almost 19 at the time, but I still wanted my dad around and try to build a relationship with him since mom was gone. Even years after he left, I wanted to try to keep him in my life but it wasn’t working out. It wasn’t meant to be. It sucks when you want to keep people in your life but if you aren’t on the same page as the other, it gets complicated. I was resisting the change. I wanted to try to make it work. But I wasn’t happy. So I’m moving on.

I actually really do like the life I’m living now. I’m thankful for those who are in my life. And I’m thankful for the people who are not so present in my life.

To end this long blog (geez I just have so much to saaaaay! And I can hear my sister saying “oh my God you write a book! Just get to the point!” Haha), here is something that I heard from a priest who was at my home church who posted this excerpt on social media. It has resonated with me since then and I refer to it all the time:

“Listen, nothing is greater than a peaceful mind.

The most fundamental thing to be remembered is that life is dialectical:

It exists through duality; it is a rhythm between opposites.

You cannot be happy forever, otherwise happiness will lose all meaning.

You cannot be in harmony forever, otherwise you become unaware of the harmony.

Harmony has to be followed by discord, and

Happiness has to be followed by unhappiness.

Every pleasure has its own pain and every pain has its own pleasure.

Unless one understands this duality of

Existence, one remains in unnecessary misery.

Whatsoever you do, whatsoever you don’t do.

Whatsoever you say, whatsoever you don’t say

Reveals you.

Whom do you think you are deceiving? If

Deception becomes a habit, ultimately you will

Have deceived yourself and no one else.

It is your own life that you are wasting in deceptions.

Life is always uncertain.

Everything dead is certain, life is always uncertain.

Everything dead is fixed-its

Nature cannot be changed;

Everything alive is moving, changing-

A flow, flexible and able to move in

Any direction.

The more you become certain, the more you will miss life…

Be childlike but don’t be childish. If you are

Childlike, you will become a great saint;

If you are childish , you will become a knowledgeable person.”

 

This conversation about change can go in any direction so feel free to question, comment, and share!

Peace and love.

 

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